Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Scrapbooking the hard stuff...

Eleven years ago, I lost my closest friend to pancreatic cancer.  And I miss her every.  single.  day.
We didn't start out as friends.  We were co-workers that were assigned to work with a person with highly aggressive behaviors (I taught special education, and Barb was assigned to work one-on-one with this person in my classroom.)  We didn't like each other much at all at first.  Slowly, over time and with honesty, we became friends.  For 4 years, we worked in the same classroom, and grew to  be the best of friends.
When I finally got pregnant the first time (after trying a long while), she was the first person I told after my husband.  She was so sick at the time, I didn't want to wait to tell her the news.  She was happy for me, but got really sad because she said she'd never live to see me give birth or become a mama. So the above photo of her attending our daughter Jami's first birthday party was a BIG deal for both of us. Great day.
We loved going to concerts.  We rushed the stage when we saw WAR in a local theatre here in town, and danced until we couldn't any longer.  We got ourselves backstage to see Dave Koz (above photo).  So many good memories...

I want to stop avoiding hard stuff when I scrapbook.  I want to somehow attempt to encapsulate my feelings about Barb, what she taught me, and share my memories of her.  A layout isn't going to do it.  Maybe a book.  Maybe a mini book. 

In all my scrapbooking, I've never done a tribute album.  This is officially on my to-do list.  I want to be sure my children know about her and our friendship.  She was such an important part of my life.

Anyone care to share your thoughts on scrapbooking hard stuff?  I'd love to hear them!

Enjoy your day!

6 comments:

Melanie said...

Thank you for posting this. I lost my best friend to breast cancer just over a year ago. I would like to know how people document these kinds of things, too. Wishing you much peace and comfort as you remember your friend.

Amy Coose said...

I am so sorry for your loss, Trish. Eight years ago, when my oldest was only 4 years old, he lost his best friend to leukemia. It was the hardest thing I've ever gone through. I did a layout, with a huge picture of the two of them, and typed up the story and tucked it behind. I wanted him to be able to read about their connection when he was older, and I didn't want to forget a single second of their time together. You will be glad you've recorded your relationship with your best friend, I bet it'll will not only give you comfort, but you'll also enjoy remembering your special relationship.

borcherding said...

((HUG)) for your loss Trish. Reading this post made me cry. Seeing the word CANCER brings tears to my eyes and reading about someone else losing a loved one to cancer just opens the flood gates. It's been over 13 years since I've lost my sister to cancer and I still haven't found the way to make a scrapbook page or book or anything about her. It's SO painful just THINKING about it. In my heart, I KNOW that this is something I MUST do for my own healing - believe me, I WANT to do it but somehow I've managed to keep it all buried inside and I know that's not the healthiest thing to do. Okay, I tend to go on and on so I'll just stop now and get me some tissues..another ((HUG)) for you Trish

Deb said...

Thinking of you and sending cyber hugs to you, Trish! After my mother died unexpectedly 19 years ago at age 58, I thought I'd never be able think or speak of her without crying. It was only because my husband bought me a scrapbook to use as a tribute album about her "whenever you're ready" that I was able to explore all my various feelings related to her life, her untimely passing, our relationship, and the change in our family dynamic. It took me a couple years before I was "ready" to deal with it all. It was tough. It was emotionally draining. But it was also a gift. . .to myself. To pay tribute to the woman who not only gave me life and nurtured me but also, after we both survived my teen years, became my very best friend. I've since lost my dad and done a similar album about him. While they may never see the end result, I hope they knew while they were here how much I loved them and love them still. May you have peace and comfort in your own grief journey. Blessings.

pickmepam said...

oh, trish! i know you will do an amazing job scrapping an album to her! reading your post and the comments, i have no idea what it is to go thru losing someone so close, and when it does happen, i hope i have the courage to scrap for them and my family.

Debbi Tehrani said...

I am so sorry to hear about this dear friend, Trish. I am sure your book you plan to make will be a wonderful tribute to her and your friendship.